Last cigarette, guess I'm quitting again until I have more money or something, or something, or something.Start a diary and suddenly have to take the computer in to get it fixed tomorrow, or rather Friday, no more writing for days. And I was beginning to like it so much. Words can be addictive, like blood. Cut deep enough and there it is.
Why do men always ask why women have so many shoes? Isn't it obvious? Because the world tells us to wear ones that make our feet hurt. Because we have to have ones that go with skirts and dresses too. Casual shoes for skirts, casual shoes for pants, smart shoes for skirts, smart shoes for pants. Shoes for long dresses, shoes for short dresses. A pair of boots. A pair of gym shoes. A pair of hiking boots. Shoes for cold weather, shoes for hot weather. My fucking Birkenstocks gave me a blister. Birkenstocks aren't meant to give you fucking blisters. Maybe it's time to cut off my feet. Maybe it's time to cut off my head.
Oh, I'm just full of bitter boring angsty spew crap tonight.
I should go on a diet or something, I'm getting fat. I took a bath earlier and splashed around in the water for an hour, pretending to be a beached whale because that's what I thought I looked like, and it amused me.
Reaching the end of my last cigarette. Another reason I should quit is that it's impossible to find an ethical tobacco company, except those Native Spirit ones and I just don't like them.
I read in the news that Bush is planning on cutting down our last forests. Fuck head. Then again, we already knew that didn't we? And he put a war criminal in charge of investigating 9/11, to help him figure out who our real enemies are and where the real threats lie. Look in the mirror shrubhead. It's you. Poisoning our air, polluting our water, selling everything off to the highest bidder or if not the highest bidder, your closest buddies. Even if they're all corporate crooks.
If one day I kill myself and the crazy christians are right, which of course they're not, at least I'll have the satisfaction of seeing Bush burn in hell with me. Ha. I'm afraid of the strong possibility of reincarnation though. That's probably what keeps me alive. Fear. Most people are afraid of death, I've never understood that. Why be afraid of freedom and release?
Oh give me that dark warm shroud, friend.
Why do I eat health food? I should drink a gallon of fat a day, to hasten the end.
