Cold outside, the bitter crisp cold that autumn turning winter should be. Something works, makes a change. No cigarettes since I last wrote, trying to save money for anti-depressants but it's hard, oh so hard on a cold smoky day like this.Today I saw a girl I used to babysit for when she was 3. Now she's 13, looking 16, pretty and glamorous in an understated way. Gave me a shiver, never thought I'd last this long.
Bob Woodward is kissing Bush's ass, so sad.
Lethargy seeps in through the cracks. Insomnia for 3 nights, then today I woke at half past seven and couldn't fall back to sleep, got up and felt I had nothing to do for hours until the mail and paper arrived. Strange emptiness of endless days. Got computer back this afternoon, respite. There is an addiction to the tap tap click click.
Eyes heavy. Something dead inside.
I don't think I can write with nothing to smoke.
