I'm not strong enough never to see you again. And I don't think it would work. I think I should try, but I don't think it would work. The craving wouldn't go away; it's like a vampire trying to give up blood.
Am I supposed to face this pain again and again until I come through it, or am I supposed to try to cut it off?
I made the mistake of mentioning you to my mother. "I don't think he's a good bet, dear" she said, oh so entirely missing the point. I didn't ask to gamble. She's the one who brought me into the game where you have no choice, you're born with two cards and you can hang on to the wheel and hope it comes to a stop or you can let go and lie wherever you're flung. I didn't ask to be born, I didn't ask to love, I didn't ask for any of it but blaming someone else just isn't allowed.
Why am I so scared?
